Monday, February 19, 2007

affair, needs

I have the person in mind, but how to handle? from his late night text messages demanding my company I simply have to respond to initiate. Easy. too easy.

The problem is hormonal. So many of use would love to be 'a bloke' about sex. have it and not worry, but there is the oxytocin problem. The hormone that women secreet when they have sex. This is the bonding hormone that keeps you wanting the bloke more, even though he may be a shit & not that good, but you have this strange obsession with him.

In order to counter the oxtocin devil, will put myselft on hormone breaks. Do forced sabaticals away from Affair Object.

But what do I want ? to have fun. not just the physical, which is why it's an 'affair' ...

An affair implies dinners, drinks, flirtations, amusements, small gifts & convoluted emotions. To be involved/ not be involved. The back & forward of commitment & desire. And just to have fun.

So I texted him on Saturday night. My affair object. Can you guess who it is? the one who has texted me a few times. Mr TypeA-SuperFit.

The messed up, post divorce, superbly fit man in a classicaly olympian way from the party last year. Who called me 'the best flirt in the world' . He's the person I could have some fun with.

it's late...more tomorrow.

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