Friday, May 05, 2006

Feedback time!

Two days after the speed date night, I meet with Dr Gabrielle Morrissey & Dr Paul Willis from the Catalyst team for an assessment of my 'flirting style'. Normally I would be mortified to be filmed then analysed, but this now seems a normal aspect to my single life...I have coaches, film crews & a planned agenda. too weird.

I was first asked a few questions about what I'm looking for, do I go outside my parameters (do I date exotics? ) & how did I think I went. Gabrielle was great in summarising my inane comments! When asked what I was looking for, I answererd 'someone whose nice, has a job, is fit & can leave stress behind', Gabrielle said I'm looking for an evolved man & that shouldn't be too hard to find: we all laughed.

When they played the video I was astonished that I didn't look like a hag. Imagining my bags, pimples & smudged lipstick all on film, I scrubbed up okay. First relief. They played a few bits, talking to guys, close ups, hands to face etc. Nothing very suprising in my behaivour. Paul then asked if I had attended finishing school or June Dally-Watkins deportment classes, as I appeared upright & held myself in my lady position. This was the entree to the analysis. In fact I didn't change much with anyone, I was polite, open, engaging, upright, but I was not obviously flirting. I was being SUBTLE. There is was the subtley word. I was revealed as the princess of subtely.

From there Gabrielle said, I should loosen up, physically, engage more, use hands, lean forward, move into bodyspace, not necessarily touching, nor about showing flesh, just moving your body. All the while she was acting out the exact moves described to me, it was enlightening & obvious, to see these engaging maneuvers performed & it was all harmless, not obvious, just inviting.

The basic premise is to show someone you are interested by responding: getting closer, be more engaging, just like you are telling a great story to friends! but you do it to a stranger.

The upshot was I behaved as if at a corporate or business function, not at a flirt fest! & you should have fun she said, and anyway after 7 minutes they moved on, so just go for it.

It was also revealed one of the speed date guys had ticked every girl, it was Zaash, my only match. how strange.

The flirt therapy was over, I felt the clunk of enlightenment hit. My challenge was to go forth and be obvious, and with the help of 'Superflirt' by Tracey Cox, (their present) I could flirt less like the Princess of Subtley.

Next filming: to be confirmed, supposebly me being a better flirt.

1 comment:

DeborahTheWordPainter said...

You've explained the process in quite an engaging manner, so it should be fun to watch the television program now and see how it translates through the filming process. Keep on having fun with it all -- and good luck!