When you're trying to discover the importance of a love interest, the female thing is to find 'meaning' in a many ways as possible. When he said, 'he'll call you later' you fervently hope he means it. Other conversations are dissected word by word to extract any camoflagued desire he is not admitting to directly. The amount of attention he gives you, the glances or stares, even reactions from his friends, all contribute to your hopes.
Friends can also encourage your hopes either by agreeing to your conclusions or telling stories of similar situations that ended happily. Hope lives in this method!
My on-going obsession with MrBV is made up mostly of these 'meanings'. There's been a few strong co-incidences recently. He has two close male friends, one called me last week, to talk about the TV show, the other was having lunch at my local & invited me to join him. My friend, Nicole, meet MrBV's sister last week & discussed his reluctance to settle down, both agreeing I would be a good choice, because of similar backgrounds and longevity of connections & that we get along. All this happened in 10 days.
Over the years, and this is where my long years of dating have taught me, using this method does not work. Dont attribute meaning to anything ! I can only believe in actions, not words or co-incidences. I'm hopeful by nature, believing things turn out well, but not this. It's driving me crazy to see these incidences as meaningful. Two years after meeting MrBV, nothing has happened. He's just a friend and I have to accept that.
Bugger all the positive thinking and wish fulfilment proposed by the self-help industry. Logic, common sense and experience are the mantras I will follow.
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10 years ago
1 comment:
Maybe all the coincidences are the universe's way of saying 'claim that which you want'. 'Do something'. 'Piss or get off the pot'. We co-create don't we hon? Not just wait for Mr Right or Mr Ok For Now to claim us?
Call him or write to him (don't text) and state the business. The worst he can say is no. Better still, go see him.
I'm not saying leap on him in Victoria's Secret drenched in some huge expensive swanky perfume and crushing him to your bosom, yelling "Take Me!" Tho you can if you want.
I just mean, ask how he feels, go where you feel uncomfortable, push a little. Ok a lot. Sometimes men need a little help. Ok a lot. :)
PS I would no more take dating advice from me than I would allow me to perform brain surgery of fix your vroomvroom. So Caveat Emptor hon.
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