dinner at MrTouche's

He's a catch. And I'm not into him. Why, oh why? he's so lovely. He cooked me dinner on Wednesday. We started with champagne, then baked salmon, too perfect. We talked about lots of things, but am I stupid to think that because we are both the same star sign, Gemini, and talking is one of our traits, that we are just being mad-talking-gemini's? it's all easy company, but too familiar.

or my other theory, that I'm only interested in guys who are not interested in me?

Here's a man who's 'light' is on (men are like vacant cabs, you have to find one with his light on) He wants to settle, he's ready to find a partner & be super-responsible. He's flicked off girls before when he was focused on his business, not ready to settle, and so puts on the cold face & appears disinterested. Now, I know this because I got an email this week from him... he said he was trying not to be distant or cold. Now I have to deal with the puppy face. All eager to be interested.

I can't take it. I feel I don't deserve this attention & I'm not that attracted to him. I like him, but I really want more time to know him before feeling anything. See, I don't trust the lust. The early feeling that puts you on a brain high. It sends you mental. I can't focus on anything, daydream all the time & then it all finishes & I have to sweep my feelings up again & find some hobby (like cooking muffins) to re-wire myself on.

So I'm trying someone I don't feel intensely for. Someone who is ready to be 'a proper boyfriend' & I hope to grow into him. Or maybe I'm completely fooling myself. Argh! I dont' know. Over it, stop thinking & just respond to someone who is being nice to you for once!

seeing him on sunday...